Welcome to a blog all about life, love and lessons learned along the way!
Time to take a deep breath and move forward. My heart is pounding and my mind is racing. Why? Blogging has always terrified me. Truly, the thought of having anything of value to share with you all seems implausible. My life is unremarkable. Growing up I was shy, insecure and afraid of my own shadow. When did that mindset change? About the same time I decided to ‘step-up’ and write this Blog.
Life (live): You could say I’ve been treading water for the last few years, kicking my legs in the eggbeater motion in order to stay afloat; and narrowly avoiding going under. The truth is I’ve been slowly drowning, taking in big gulps of water, desperately awaiting the life raft of my dreams, hopes and expectations to rescue me and plant my feet on terra firma. I’m excited. I’m grounded, no longer performing to the daily expectations of others; instead I’ve hit the ground running and I am free. Free to live each day grateful for my opportunity to show my life is, in fact, remarkable.
Love: I’ve always been loved however I’ve struggled to love. I contemplated the meaning of phrases such as ‘no one is ever going to love you more than you love yourself. If you can’t ‘find’ yourself, who YOU are, how can anyone else find YOU?’ Given I didn’t love myself, even the slightest bit, I was convinced no one else did either.
What changed? I have 3 children; last year while I was going through a particularly hard time, one child said to me ‘you don’t want me anymore, you don’t love me…’ Ouch, that hurt as this child wasn’t just playing a guilt card on me for saying ‘no’ to a play date they were genuinely feeling disconnected from me. I was devastated that they seemed to echo my inner negative voice. It was this statement alone that gave me the long overdue kick in the butt to recognise my self-loathing (I’m-never-going-to-amount-to-anything attitude) and my outward expression towards my nearest and dearest. Words are not enough when expressing emotion and it required immediate action to get my priorities in order, spend time (there is no such thing as “quality time” – I’ll talk more about that in another blog) and start to live life.
I have discovered love, motivation and drive: my family, my passion, my life.
Learn: My desire to learn, grow spiritually and be all that I can be is overwhelming. I don’t sleep at night until I have read something I didn’t previously know, until I’ve told someone something they hadn’t previously heard or until I’ve accepted something I couldn’t previously comprehend. I will continue to learn and to then share that knowledge as I believe it is not mine to keep.
Live In Love Photography: Is my desire to capture life, right now, this moment, as we are today, because right now is all we have and tomorrow is still a dream away.
I am unique. I am living a remarkable life.
Dream Big. Live In Love.
*If you feel depressed, anxious, have feelings of self doubt or just need someone to talk to please don’t hesitate to contact a professional: http://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/get-immediate-support